Are you an up-and-coming MMA fighter looking for a nickname? Are you tired of the same old boring, cookie-cutter nicknames? Do you want a moniker so outlandish that fans won’t be able to forget it? You have come to the right place.
Of course, these aren’t handles that will strike fear into the heart of your opponent. Instead, we here at The Touchback have compiled really ridiculous UFC nicknames that are memorable. If you take yourself seriously, these won’t be for you.
There are a few ground rules we needed to set up. Firstly, our really ridiculous UFC nicknames had to be broadcast friendly. That meant no curse words or racial slurs. Secondly, they had to be practical. You can’t have anything longer than a few words and no sound effects. As long as you give The Touchback credit, feel free to take any of our suggestions.
More Fighting: The art of the boxing dive
4 really ridiculous UFC nicknames you’re free to use
The Taint Whisperer
I actually went to high school with a current UFC fighter. No hints on who he is, but every time I see his face, I think this guy looks like a taint whisperer. There is just something about it that makes you believe he is whispering to taints when not training or whoring himself out on social media for shitty products. Alas, he isn’t using it, which means The Taint Whisperer can be yours.
This nickname works because it is vulgar without crossing the line. Dana White may be a massive scumbag, but there is no way he is letting some fighter use the nickname Dr. Hard Cock or Pussy Crusher. However, The Taint Whisperer is probably tame enough to slip through the cracks.
Chevrolet (or any car manufacturer)
It is surprising no UFC fighter has followed in the footsteps of Cadillac Williams or Ronnie “H2” Brown. Using a car manufacturer or model makes you instantly recognizable and sets up a lucrative endorsement.
There is also a possibility the car manufacturer hates you and doesn’t want you using their brand as a nickname. That’s great too. You can use the dispute to your advantage and gain some extra publicity.
UFC Meets UFO: Diego Sanchez and other strange sports stories
69
Nice. Like The Taint Whisperer, 69 is a nickname that is suggestive without crossing the line into obscenity. The nickname itself is short, memorable and funny. Plus, it would be epic to hear Bruce Buffer belt out, “This is First Name. SIIIXTY NIIIIIINNNNNEEEE. Last Name.”
Ketchup
The inspiration for this nickname comes from the VH1 show I Love New York that aired in the mid-2000s. If you’re unfamiliar with the program, here’s the gist of it. One of the contestants from Flavor Flav’s dating show got her own dating show. It was very loud and mostly unmemorable apart from the constants’ nicknames.
These monikers were extremely generic. But here’s the thing. When you hear people call each other by generic nicknames that they’ve clearly never went by before, it becomes comical.
I watched every episode of I Love New York and couldn’t tell you anything that happened on any episode. I can, however, identify most of the contestants to this day. Mr. Boston. T-Weed. 20 Pack. Heat. Wolf. I could go on. The stupid nicknames made these people memorable.
Which brings us to our last really ridiculous UFC nickname–Ketchup. It’s so dumb. And yet, if you heard a fighter being called Ketchup, you’re not going to forget them. They could get their ass kicked every single time they enter the octagon, and it wouldn’t matter. You’d just remember the nickname.
